Letter to my former self

This is a special post based on the idea of if you were to write a letter to yourself  10 years ago, what would you write? This is a post that was inspired by my blog-friend Luli (she did it thanks to another blogger called Kezza). I hope it makes some sense, and isn’t too much of a grammatically incorrect rant.

Dear Ben,

I know currently you’re not caring about your future and more interested in trivial things. Unfortunately small crap will always distract you, but I’m going to explain some things that only hindsight can truly deliver. You’re intelligent, you’ll always do well regardless of the amount of effort you put into anything you study. You should study a bit more and waste time a bit less. It’s hard to justify how marks in subjects matter, but eventually uni courses, jobs and careers will focus on those numbers. Don’t panic about the HSC. People build it up to be the be-all-and-end-all event. It really only decides your choice of uni and course, there are always going to be exams so do your best.

Please learn a language or play the guitar. I squandered the chance to do both of these in high school and these are practical skills you’ll enjoy. Don’t fret about high school friendships and rivalries. You will hardly ever see people from high school again, and you will meet true friends and soulmates later. Get into the habit of looking after yourself. Start using the gym, eat better and take pride in your personal appearance. Even though you are correct in your belief that appearance is a shallow measure of a person, you’ll always be judged at face value initially…you can only make a first impression once.

You respect women, which is great and admirable. Your strong beliefs on what is right and wrong will serve you well. I’m going to sum up how to deal with girls you like in one word; confidence. You’ll eventually stop over analysing and over thinking things, but it’ll take a lot of painful lessons. Be bold, you tend to try and be subtle with your feelings towards women. You have to express your interest in a way that can’t be mistaken. You’ll hear the phrase “just friends” enough to shake your confidence in yourself. You have a nasty habit for developing feelings for your female friends, I can’t help you with that. I will just say this: unless they have expressed some form of interest, or you are sure of it, it is usually best not to act on them. You have a great sense of humour and a cocky confidence about you that will eventually discover, some friends will even claim you have “game””, though your unsuccessful attempts with women currently outweighs your successful ones. You will learn and grow in relationships, but be mindful of how you truly feel and be careful not to ever lead anyone on. You will have to hurt girls feelings from time to time, which you hate, but it’s always better to be honest than mislead someone.

When you are frustrated, and lonely and annoyed at being single just remember one golden rule; the best things happen when you least expect it.

Be careful not to let people take advantage of your kind nature. You are generous, but if you aren’t wary they will use you.

Hug your dog and go on walks with him. He won’t be around forever. You won’t realise how amazing he is until it’s too late.

You’ll eventually be described as a “pillar of strength”, which will be an understatement. You will face circumstances that are tough, horrible and sad. You always know when your help is needed. This comes from your greatest strengths; perception, observation, empathy and altruism. Trust your instincts about people, they will serve you well. Your altruism is a double bladed weapon, you will win friends, foster respect and admiration through your mindfulness of others. It will also be a weakness which you will somehow have to overcome. You will repeatedly sacrifice your own happiness for that of others. Whilst it is very noble, you need to make sure you are selfish from time to time and do what’s best for you. This will also become an issue with relationships, and once again… I have no answer for you about this.

You are a very unique person, both an extrovert and an introvert. You are currently very quiet and careful. I would recommend hanging out with your mates more, meeting girls and experiencing life a bit. Be more outgoing and talk up more often. Silent observation of people will help you understand psychology, but social interaction is worth its weight in gold.

You’ll always be a nerd. Don’t rush out and purchase all the latest toys and games, borrow them from someone. Don’t purchase the replica Boba Fett blaster.

Keep playing Rugby. You love it, it keeps you fit and you’re good at it.

You will be a leader, whether you want to or not. That inner strength and confidence you have, coupled with organisational abilities and amazing interpersonal skills, mean that people will follow your lead. You’ll never have issues creating a report with people, or making friends.

Don’t stay awake until 3:35am writing blog posts. You are a weird/strange person, but that is what sets you apart. Follow your own morals and beliefs and trust yourself. You should have better English and stop ranting and raving when you write.

Ben at 24 years old.

p.s  Write down the recipes of everything you love to eat, you never know when you won’t be able to ask that person how it was made.

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6 thoughts on “Letter to my former self

  1. god don’t you wish that you give this letter to yourself 10 years ago?? its amazing how much the knowledge of 10 years could help anyone. i know i would have some choice words with 11 year old me!

    p.s i know the last sentence is about Nancy’s rissole’s!!

    • Thanks. Yea some of my friends said the dog bit was their favourite part too. I hope I turned out alright. It’s funny, if you did change all the stuff that happened to you, you wouldn’t end up the same person you are today.

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